For the birthday girl...

To my dearest baby girl,

Happy 4th birthday, Brianna! You are growing up so fast, I wish I could grip whatever it is that's making you grow and just ask it to slow down a bit.

I am so proud of all the things that you are doing and all the things that you are trying to do. No matter what happens, kahit sobrang naghihigpit ako sayo (sabi nila), please know that I've got your back - and your well-being in mind - all the time. I will support you through everything you will ever decide upon on from now until the end of time because I know that you are a smart girl. That you know what you should and shouldn't do. Yes, even at the tender age of 4, I trust your intuition and your decisions. Sometimes I disagree with you and force my thinking on you and for those times, I apologize. I guess it's human/mommy nature to nag but know that I am doing everything I can to improve my "mommy-ness" everyday. Susubukan kong hindi maging nagger and assuming talaga kasi sa lahat ng ayaw ko, yang dalawang yan talaga. I will try to be that mom you can confide everything - literal, 'nak, everything kahit sex life mo pa yan - in and that mom you would be proud to "share" with your friends.

I am so happy that you are growing up to be that respectful albeit shy little girl (at first) that you are now. There's nothing wrong with being shy, despite what other people are telling you. Keep that in mind. I love you for who you are and I won't change anything, Lovey. You are perfect in my eyes, despite all the "imperfections" that other people seem to see in you, a little girl.

Thank you for making Mommy feel better whenever I feel sad. Your simple "Mommy, why are you crying?" is enough to put a smile on my face. Your hugs make me feel loved despite all the wrongs in our world. Your attempt to literally wipe away my tears helps me build the strength to just keep going despite wanting to give up and just end everything. You are truly the reason why I am here and why I am pushing through all the hardships.

My wish for you is for you to grow up to be the best you truly are meant to be and for you to grow up  healthy, loving, respectful, strong, and courageous. I also wish for you to follow your heart's desires, no matter what they may be. I will be right behind you 100%.

Thank you, honey, and I love you so much. We will get through everything together and come out victorious in the end.

Happy birthday, Brianna Angelica!