Excited!

In fourth grade, I got excited over going to Baguio for the first time. I couldn't sleep the night before the trip.

In junior year, I got excited over prom. I couldn't sleep the night before prom.

In third year college, I got excited over thesis defense. I couldn't sleep the night before defense.

Now, I am excited for Jellybean's Brianna Angelica's 4D ultrasound tomorrow morning. I can barely shut my eyes without seeing how my baby would look like.

THIS IS TOO AWESOOOOOOME!

I got 2nd hand baby clothes!

Okay, I got the baby clothes months before this entry but I didn't get to take a look at the clothes 'til this weekend. My tita gave me the baby clothes, telling me my baby will outgrow it before I know it so it's wiser not to buy onesies anymore. Took the advise and actually asked for her baby's clothes. The white bathrobe-y clothes babies wear and the white booties, white mittens and white tiny wittle bonnets.

And these onesies. Both my mom and my tita swore Jellybean would only wear these for a couple of months and outgrow it...

So, anyway, the point of this entry is to ask for suggestions on what Jellybean should wear when she leaves the hospital with us. I know this sounds like a very girly problem but, yeah, surprise, Jellybean's a girl. Anyway, the first one's really cute plus it has buttons on the punja area to make diaper changing easier. The second one is adorable because she'll be warm all the way to her toes because the onesie's sewed shut at the bottom. The last one is adorably cute because it has bears' heads at the bottom where the feet should be!

I was screaming "Awwww" when I saw all three. Now I don't know which one Jellybean should wear...

This is way cool...

I can already feel Jellybean's whole arm and legs when she moves.

I really have a person growing inside of me. :)

I WANT THIS FOR JELLYBEAN! Somebody get this for me... HER! :D

To mi bebe...

You make momma happy

by making waves in her tummy. ☺

I'm sorry!

I poked Jellybean with my college diploma and she kicked me.

Mommy's sorry, angel!

My post-pregnancy bod.

I've been really thankful lately...

Why?

Because I have a very healthy body (surprisingly) and a very healthy baby girl.

I've heard news about friends being pregnant as well but unfortunately for them, they need to be on bed rest in the duration of their pregnancy. Me? I have the freedom to do whatever I want (just as long as I don't abuse my body and no alcohol and cigarettes).

I'm really thankful.

And I'm praying for my friends who need to stay in bed all the time.

What I like and what I don't like...

I've been craving for doughnuts - Choco Frosted from Dunkin' Donuts to be specific - since they day we knew. What really surprised me are the scents I want and don't want to smell.

1. I used to like this Dolce & Gabana scent but now, it just smells like old lady to me. What's worse is my brother's girlfriend wears that exact same scent. Now, whenever she's here, I just want to throw her out of the house.
2. I feel weirded out by this: I sometimes like the smell of smoke. Smoke as in yosi. Weird, right? No bias and all...
3. I also feel weirded out by this: I don't like the smell of alcohol. Alcohol as in alak. WHATISHAPPENINGTOME?! Alcohol has been running in through my veins for the longest time and I LOVE the smell of post-inuman on a person and now, I can't stand smelling it even for just a second.

Cravings? Not so weird. What I don't like to smell? Damn weird.

Oh my...

Damn. Due date is nearing and I honestly am scared. Don't get me wrong, though. I can't wait to finally meet my little girl but I can't help but be scared terrified of what will happen.

First of all, I don't have any ideas about raising a child. All I have is the knowledge of how I wanted to grow up. That's it. I don't even know how to carry a small child. I always get this vision in my head that I might drop the little thing or that I might be hurting the kid. It's just scary.

Second, I don't think my character and personality is tailored fit to raise a child. I am childish, selfish and most of the time, reckless so I don't know how I'll get by.

Third, I am terrified of the idea that I might be raising her wrong. I might miss something or not know something that she might blame me in the end. I wouldn't know it in the process. Malalaman ko nalang pag anjan na.

Lastly, I am scared. Just plain scared. I don't know what the future will hold. That scares the hell out of me.

All I can do is live one day at a time and pray my hardest that she grows up well.